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8 months old |
July 2, 2006
Today is one year since the birth of our littlest Anthony and today, on his
first birthday as a memorial, I would like to share the words spoken by his
father this past Thursday as we lay Anthony to rest. These are the words
spoken at Anthony's funeral mass - a tribute to your many faith filled
prayers that sustained the littlest life of Anthony Emmanuel Arritola and
his family.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 In Loving Memory of:
ANTHONY EMMANUEL ARRITOLA
July 8, 2005 - July 2, 2006
Before our son was born, a Eulogy was pre-written for his
gestation by the ones who make rules for this Earthly life. His history of
life was predetermined by man, to be unworthy of surviving a life that would
amount to anything. Sixteen months ago, this eulogy read something like
this:
Your pregnancy will not come to fruition so you are allowed to take control
to ensure that it will not interrupt your earthly life. If it is born, it
will not be able to sustain its own life outside the womb so it is OK if you
choose not to feed it. It will not get hungry nor want. It will not have the
mental ability to do these things, it may only grow with the increased
probability that it will not survive and you will be devastated - so it is OK
to refuse any surgical or medical intervention because this will not help
with statistics.
Philippians 4: 6 - 7
"Have no anxiety at all, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with
thanksgiving, make your requests known to God. Then the peace of God that
surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ
Jesus."
Matthew 11: 28 - 30
"Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened, and I will give you rest.
Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart;
and you will find rest for yourselves. For my yoke is easy, and my burden
light."
 Naturally, we mourned the loss of our infant son. So when did we snap out of
it? I'm not sure we did. Our human desires for our future, our expectations
for our family and our children's hopes of growing and playing in love with
their littlest brother were torn down with no hope of recovery. All because
of the pre-written eulogy.
MENTAL NOTE TO SELF: NEVER START A LIFE WITH DEATH - YOU ARE SURE TO FAIL at
living!
Thankfully, we have been taught to teach our children in the moral law
taught to us by our faith and our fathers ... all have the right to life,
freedom and the pursuit of happiness. We hold these truths to be
self-evident, that all men are created equal; that they are endowed by their
Creator with inherent and inalienable rights; that among these are LIFE,
liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
This is where Anthony's story picks up. His is a story of more than just
standing up for rights. His is a story of more than just life, but of the
dignity of man and the reverence we have towards God for allowing our bodies
to be earthen hosts of our Creators heavenly Spirit.
Anthony's life is a testimony sent to test the minds and hearts of men. God
remains the sovereign Master of life. We are obliged to accept life
gratefully and preserve it for his honor and the salvation of our souls. We
are stewards, not owners, of the life God has entrusted to us. It is not
ours to dispose of. But in his short 11 month period of time from birth to
death ... he lived and he lived abundantly. Anthony shared a gift with our
family that allowed us to be surrounded by Gods grace. He restored our
brokenness in our family. He healed his brothers of unseen inner pains; he
helped us learn more about how to love.
 ~Sam Keen says,
"We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an
imperfect person perfectly"
John 14: 2 - 3
"In my Father's house there are many dwelling places. If there were not,
would I have told you that I am going to prepare a place for you? And if I
go and prepare a place for you, I will come back again and take you to
myself, so that where I am you also may be."
So here we are at the inevitable, a day that proves to the medical community
that Anthony did not survive. But I testify Anthony did live a life that
amounted to something. Against the expectations of the larger medical
community, Anthony perplexed even the most learned of the specialists. He
came back from life 13 times his past two weeks alone, not to mention a
number of times before then. All on his own, all atypical and all simply
quite amazing. He was a strong man for having such a frail body.
Anthony was given more than just his right to life. He was given the moral
dignity of a sacred soul made in Gods image. He was surrounded by love of
God, his family, friends and even strangers. He was lifted in prayer from
boys and girls to priests and nuns and even those who privately confessed to
us they had fallen away from God. They sent us their amazing stories for why
they chose to have faith and pray for Anthony. Anthony was a happy well
loved little man.
Anthony received countless prayers and more importantly, our family has born
witness to how God touches souls through his little ones. Oh how much we can
learn from these littlest of souls. WE don't exactly understand how, we just
watched and pondered the events in our hearts. Through these trials and
lessons in life, we have come to know and love all of you. And You ALL have
remained in our prayers.
T he support our family has received from family members, fellow
parishioners, neighbors, friends, co-workers, and total strangers has been
very much appreciated by our family. In addition to our closest friends and
family, additional prayer chains were sprung off by people whom you shared
Anthony's story, or who have come to visit our website. It has all been a
blessing we were fortunate to be a part of.
Like the greatness that God is ... Anthony's life story sprang amazingly out
into the world and only God truly knows how many have been touched. We are
blessed to have been encouraged along our journey by so many faith filled
people. I can say with an abiding confidence that the grace flowing through
the Body of Christ in his Church has carried us along a journey from
crushing grief and sorrow to feelings filled with joy and a calm reality.
This Faith of ours, this glorious Catholic Faith, has for centuries boldly
proclaimed that an infant who is baptized and then dies, as our precious
Anthony has, is carried directly to the waiting arms of God to enjoy the
Beatific Vision and live in Paradise forever. We as Catholic parents are
called by our vocation of marriage to strive above all else to work toward
helping our children arrive in Heaven someday. The Church assures us that
our baby is now in Heaven. How can we not be filled with joy?
John 19: 26 - 27
When Jesus saw his mother and the disciple there whom he loved, he said to
his mother "Woman behold your son." Then he looked at his disciple and said
"Behold your mother." And from that hour the disciple took her into his
home. At the same time, the Church gently encourages us to embrace sorrow. The
night that Anthony passed away, we were praying the scriptural rosary during
his final moments. When Anthony's spirit left us, and as my wife sat in the
rocking chair holding his lifeless little body, I remembered that
James-Christian had given Anthony his scapular for Anthony to wear (just to
make sure!). James found comfort in the promise of the scapular for his
little brother. The promise of the scapular implies that Mary will intercede to ensure that the wearer of the Scapular obtains the grace of
final perseverance that is of dying in a state of grace. I can just picture
Mary coming down and escorting Anthony to meet her son, our Lord and Savior,
Jesus Christ. God is good. He allows us to share in a small way with Mary
and all of her suffering. The Church teaches us not to waste suffering but
to use it as an opportunity to show our dependence on God.
O ne might think that it would be difficult to eulogize the short life of an
11 month child, but let me share some insight, regarding the people Anthony
has touched over the past 16 months.
* We have read close to if not over 200 emails from persons around the world
as far as Switzerland, Egypt and Australia and Canada and even as close as
Alaska, California and Mexico, not to mention the neighbors of the
southeastern United States.
* I've heard parents expressing their desire to run home and hold close
their own children.
* I've heard reassessments of how incredibly precious each and every little
life is that God gives us.
* I've heard recognitions of how truly short, life is, and how suddenly it
can end, which in turn resulted in personal conversions of faith or
inquiries about God, faith and eternal life.
* I have seen faith strengthened, faith renewed, and I have seen families
reunited.
* My wife has had the privilege of witnessing the power of Anthony's complex
diagnosis baffle the medical community and see them either push away from
him as an enigma or draw closer to marvel at his miraculous nature.
In short, our baby's limited life and recent death has prompted some
wonderful things. This, then, is our family prayer -
We gladly offer our baby back to You God and endure the sorrowful pain of
missing the soul we have come to love, but if our offering prompts just one
soul to grow closer to You, we offer Anthony with greater joy than our
sorrow.
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2 months old |
It just so happens, Anthony wouldn't settle for just one. In addition to
multitudes around the world, we have also born witness to a closer
conversion.
Big brother Lorenzo, how much you've grown my son. It has been truly
beautiful to have witnessed your spiritual growth, and how much you love
Anthony.
James Christian, your compassion and love that you have shared towards your
little brother are an example for all to marvel.
Tray, you are Anthony's oldest brother, and have demonstrated incredible
courage, leadership, and unshakable faith. Your humble protection was meek
yet noticeable.
We love you guys with all our hearts.
Helen Keller once said,
"Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of
trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and
success achieved".
We have so many treasured memories of you Anthony:
* Your rodeo style pulling out of your NG tube to sway around like a lasso.
* The many smiles you graced us with...The silly one & only rolling giggle
you shared with us when mom tickled you during a doctor's visit. I pray we
never forget that beautiful sound and the memory of your puffy smiling
cheeks.
* Your beautiful long eye lashes that were the envy of every woman.
* The warm relaxing showers we took together and your calming sigh.
* Playing toesies with your stinky feet.
* Singing songs out of tune while you slept.
* And lastly, whispering 'I Love You' in your ear every night as you lay in
your crib asleep. Today we whisper to you again, We Love You, Anthony.
Anthony Emmanuel your courage and strength inspired many, and made me a
better man. I will never forget how you called me Da. We will forever love
you, and I can't wait until we meet again.
And finally, to you my beautiful bride whose arms ache for our beautiful
little angel, you have sustained us through all of this
unselfishly and with dignity and humility in imitation of our Blessed
Mother. I know well that your heart is aching and I love you.
Romans 8: 18, 28 - 31
"I consider that the sufferings of this present time are as nothing compared
with the glory to be revealed for us. We know that all things work for good
for those who work for God, who are called according to his purpose. For
those he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his
first born among my many brothers. And those he predestined he also called;
and those he called he also justified; and those he justified he also
glorified. What then shall we say to this? If God is for us, who can be
against us?"
.... Blessed Be the Name of the Lord!"
REST IN PEACE ANTHONY
http://gregoryarritola.tripod.com
Providing support for families with an incompatible with life diagnosis or
Failure to Thrive Issues
The angels are singing in heaven as we rejoice
in the Glory of our Lord Jesus Christ. He has redeemed us - that we may
have life. And I am hopeful to see my little angel again.
Anthony Emmanuel Arritola
July 8, 2005 - July 2, 2006
Littlest Anthony will always be remembered as a fighter. He taught so many
of us so many things.
Janina and Rick Arritola
and Anthony's three older brothers:
Tray Gregory - 11 years old this Tuesday
James-Christian Gregory - 9 years old
Lorenzo Arritola - 9 years old
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SOFT
Rick
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speaks Spanish) & Janina Arritola (available for support)
770-888-6484
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