October 27, 2006

Urbana, Illinois (IL)

11-20-06
EULOGY FOR ZACHARY

Hello everyone. Thank you for coming and sharing in Zachary's life. This means a lot to him and to us as well.

First I want to say that I want this day to be remembered as a celebration of Zachary's life, however short it may have been. We are mourning the loss of him, but we are also celebrating his life. You see, Zachary was a fighter, and he was stubborn.

I call him stubborn because every time we went in for a sonogram, we had problems with him. He would be upside down, with his back towards us, hiding his `parts' so we could not tell if he was indeed a boy! He was stubborn in how he irritated Kim inside of her. The pressing outwards hardly, the moving, the big kicks (enjoyed all of them!),  the heartburn he caused. And in a way he was stubborn when we found out that he had problems. But as stubborn as he was, he was a fighter, against all the odds that were thrown at him, he fought them all off. I'll get into hat later.

The day we found out about his problems, we were devastated. It felt like the end of the world. But we quickly came to realize that he was special and that he was going to change our lives. During Zachary's six months inside Kim's womb, we loved every minute of it. The kicking that he did. Reading stories to him nightly. Spending just quality time with him. Moments that the two of us and I sure that he too will never forget. We grew to love him more than I could imagine we ever could.

Zachary was to be born on December 20 as a planned birth. More stubbornness! He was born on October 27. And let me tell you he was stubborn right up until the time he was born!! That morning the doctor told us that he may live for a few minutes. He fought! He fought and held on for 90 minutes that Friday morning. More than we could have asked for. More than we could have prayed for. More than we WERE asking for. When he was born I remember nervously asking the doctor, "Is he out" while at the same time feeling very queasy! Yes the Dr. said. Then I had to ask the next question. "Is he alive" Yes the doctor. said.

Immediately I turned around and there he was being wrapped in a blanket. All 2 lbs (9ounces and 15 inches of him. He looked so calm, so happy to be with us. He was thanking us for everything, he was praising god, he was telling everyone that it was OK. Those 90 minutes went by so fast, and he started to as well. Every time I held him and did not see him breathed for a while I thought the worst. But once more he fought and breathed. He was passed around family and friends. He had several pictures and videos taken of him. He reached out to the sky for his daddy, for his mommy and I believe to tell us he had done his job and he was saying "OK, I did what I was sent to do. Its time for me to go home" Then, at 2;32 AM, he went home. His job was completed here. And he went back to where he came from. He became healed, and complete. Our little angel did whatever he was supposed to do. We still held him for several hours later. We laughed, we cried, we shared stories, he was passed around. The nurses dressed him up for us and cleaned him up. I have to say the hardest time for us was when we realized we had to give him up. Harder than knowing that he went on, we had to give him up.

Anyway, Zachary had a short time here. And we can wonder what he might have been when he grew up. A firefighter, a police officer, a banker, a movie star, a writer, a teacher, a doctor, a lawyer, an astronaut, a CEO of a major company, a father, a grandfather, an uncle. But I believe in his short time here, he did more than any of those professions could ever do. Zachary was many things in his short life and still is. He is a son, a grandson, a cousin, a nephew, a friend. He has several things in his life, grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins, a mommy and a daddy. And a God who obviously loves him so much that he gave him to us.

When the nurses took him a way after we said our goodbyes that morning, I ran out the door and into the hall where he was. I picked him up one more time and held him. I told him a loved him once more. I then told him to be a good boy. But I know that he already was and will always be a good boy We miss him so much, but he will always be with us no matter what, He is in a better place, a place full of love and peace. He will never learn hate or anger or hurt, pain, loss, poverty, he will always now nothing but good. And for that I call for a celebration.

Jeff Kacmarynski

10-30-06
We have a visitation on Tuesday and his funeral will be Wednesday. My parents will be here on Tuesday. We have clearly seen Zachary's purpose, in which God had for him, or we are starting to see it. So many relationships esp. in family have been mended or are starting to mend. Any way here is a link to the funeral home and you can find his obituary link.  http://www.hilligossshraderfh.com/index.cfm

Thanks once more and I hope to get the really good pics of us as a family very soon!
Jeff Kacmarynski

10-27-06
Zachary Mykal Kacmarynski was born October 27, 2006 at 1am. We had 90 wonderful minutes with him until he went home to be with his Father in Heaven. We will have a lot more info soon. Thank you all for your support and prayers.
 Jeff and Kim Kacmarynski
 jeffkacmarynski@yahoo.com

10-26-06
Hi, This morning at about 2:30 AM, Kim's water broke. We are at the hospital right now awaiting Zachary's birth. He is very pre-mature and the doctor's outlook was NOT good at all for his survival because of his early delivery. However, our doctor is Catholic and was very understanding and talked to us about a lot of things as well as comforted us. We will update as soon as we can. Thank you for all of your prayers and support.  Jeff and Kim Kacmarynski, soon to be proud parents of Zachary Mykal Kacmarynski!

10-9-06
Tonight we were at some friends of ours from our church, when Zachy (as Jeff sometimes calls him) started really moving like crazy! This was a very moving experience and showed both of us that he is still very much alive and that keeping him is the best and only decision we could have ever made! 

9-14-06
We went to the specialist today for another sonogram. There was some improvement in the growth of Zachary's head, and we even got to see some of his facial features! Sadly, his heart has some major "defects" as the doctor put it. He told us that Zachary may only live for up to 18 hours and kind of gave us the "incompatible with life" talk. However, the specialist was very nice and very understanding about this. We are still awaiting some further test results, and our next doctor visit next month.

9-8-06
Went to the doctor today. She told us that yes, indeed he has trisomy 13. She gave us some names at the hospital to talk to for planning and what things we want to have happen after his birth. The doctor was very understanding about all of this and very helpful today. Our next sonogram is coming up on Thursday of next week.

9-1-06
Today Kim felt Zachary really kick for the first time during work! She was teaching in class when she felt him! The is the first real signifigant movement she has felt other than little tiny movements.  Then tonight we were at some friends of ours from our church, when Zachy (as Jeff sometimes call him) started really moving like crazy!

This was a very moving experience and showed both of us that he is still very much alive and that keeping him is the best and only decision we could have ever made!  

Next sonogram is coming up very shortly.....

8-31-06